Sheila Simpson, 26 years old
You cautiously introduced him to mom and dad as your "friend" at the school art festival. Their not-so-subtle reaction was easy to read: Your parents hate him. Whether they think that he's a "bad boy" type or simply don't think that he's right for their precious princess, telling your parents that you're dating someone they hate is a challenge that you must meet. Telling mom and dad that you're dating a girl they can't stand is likely to bring up powerful emotions. As with any difficult conversation, before you open your mouth, look inward and identify your emotions. Take those feelings and use them how to tell your parents your dating someone they hate your conversation, suggests the article "Talking to Your parents -- or Other Adults" on the TeensHealth website.
It will probably happen to you at least once in your life. You'll fall for somebody how to tell your parents your dating someone they hate your parents don't like. Sometimes their disapproval will be valid, other times it will be irrational, but no matter what it will be hard for you to deal with. Before taking on the role of diplomat, or even worse the role of family agitator, there are some things that you need to examine. Why are you dating this person?
To them, no man will EVER be good enough for her. In situations like that, there is often little you will be able to do to change their mindset. So, is the situation hopeless to the point where you should move on and forget about her? It all depends on how you handle it. Before you cut off your relationship, consider the following common mistakes that some guys make which only cause these types of situations to worsen. Then, think about how you would handle the situation better.
How to tell your parents your dating someone they hate
More about how to tell your parents your dating someone they hate:
Negotiating relationships between loved ones is not always easy, and when your loved ones dislike each other, it can bring imbalance to your life, causing stress, anxiety and unhappiness. Perhaps one of the most challenging relationships to balance is the one that exists between your parents and your significant other. When parents disapprove of the person you are dating, it can make both your relationship with your parents and your dating relationship more difficult and uncomfortable. This can be particularly challenging and upsetting when parents are quite adamant about their feelings for your boyfriend and appear unwilling to alter their opinions. Give some thought to why your parents dislike or even hate your boyfriend. Research has found that friends and family often have a more objective view of their loved ones' relationships and, as such, often have more accurate predictions concerning the quality of relationships and their eventual outcome. Sometimes, when you are inside of a relationship, you can be blinded by your feelings and unable to how to tell your parents your dating someone they hate and objectively evaluate your relationship or your partner. This blindness can lead to an acceptance of personality traits or relationship issues that will eventually lead to the relationship's demise.
I lived in an unhealthy family for more than 40 years, but I didn't make the choice to "break up" with my parents overnight. For most people, it's unimaginable for a grown man or woman to choose to stop all contact with their parents. The people who provided food, clothes, and shelter, attended dance recitals, volunteered at school, or cheered from the bleachers during every Friday night's football game don't deserve to be abandoned in their old age just because they made some parenting mistakes, right? According to Monica Ross, LPC, "If either party feels as though they cannot be respectful, loving, and supportive towards the other, how to tell your parents your dating someone they hate yes, it's time to move on and find those with whom one can. This is true for family members, friends, coworkers, and really anyone one would surround oneself with. Dysfunction, especially when combined with abuse, does not end once a child reaches adulthood or because the abuser begins to get old. By then, the abusive parent is well-versed in the tactics needed to make their children do what they want, and these behaviors are likely to continue right up until the parents' death, unless someone—usually the abused—makes it stop.
Finding someone you love who loves you in return can be difficult. Then learning how to deal with conflicts within a relationship can be painful, as well. But there is an entire additional level of stress when, for some reason, you discover your parent s disapprove of the person you are dating. Having secrets and lies between you and your parents ruins trust and causes needless stress and drama which will affect your self-esteem, grades, and even your other friends. It is worth pushing pause on your anger and emotions and considering whether your parents may be right. Parents remember their own good and bad choices while dating.